Contradiction...

A number of year ago, while facilitating a lead team meeting at a church, I had a revelation that wasn't really all that drastic, but one that has helped me have a much better understanding of who I am and how I operate.  

**Revelation = I am a somewhat balanced person but it is not because I have found or live in the center in many areas of life.  It is because I live and exist at the extremes in the areas of life that I spend much time in.**

If you have spent much time with me at all this will not seem like that big of a deal (although it should inspire a quick prayer for my family as "I" am not the easiest kind of person to live with forever).  Here is why I am thinking about and sharing this today...

With the launch of our weekly gatherings this week I feel this internal battle raging between the thought of being big and being small!  I love the relationships and depth that smaller more organic things have.  I love the energy and impact that something big has.  I have been part of large ministries that were fairly heartless, and while there was excitement and enough resources to continue for what seemed like forever, it was not what I wanted to give my life for.  I have been part of smaller ministries that were amazing and had a depth and intimacy that I treasure to this day...but the lack of energy and sustainability, in the long run, caused something that I loved to die.

God, help the deep to be big so that we can make a real dent in this community for your Kingdom and help us to find a number of ways to be small and intimately connected to each other and to you!